Friday, October 9, 2009

Back To Blogging - Random Post

The last several posts have basically said I know I have not been keeping my blog up to date. It's been over a month since my last post and so much has been going on. Most of it too personal to get into too much detail (other than the cryptic Facebook status updates - what was I thinking?). If you are close to me and Frank then you know what's been going on. Things are getting more stable and I am happier. Still a lot to work out. Our house is still on the market. It's only been a month, but we have only had 2 showings and 1 open house with 1 looker.

Aside from the drama the past month or so has brought, I have not been working out and I have been watching way too much TV. Currently, I am watching:

Project Runway
Smallville
Supernatural
Vampire Diaries (lame, but giving it a chance)
True Blood (just finished the 1st season)
Ghost Hunters
Ghost Whisperer
...do you see a theme here?

I have also been cooking again and being more domestic. I abandoned anything domestic this past summer to party like I was 20 instead. Once I figured out this having a kid thing wasn't going to happen, it’s like a switch was flipped in my head and my brain was transported back 10 years. What the hell was I thinking? It reaked havoc on my marriage, my body, my mind. I guess I was thinking if I wasn't going to have children, I didn't need to be domestic. I also had 4 years of stress built up of trying to get pregnant and being let down each and every month. I felt free almost like I didn't need to stay healthy anymore and I could treat my body like a playground of sorts. Every decision I made in the past 4 years had "what if I get pregnant" at the forefront of it. I also stopped working out and put on 10 pounds. So I have been easing back into the gym and hope to be back to my normal self soon.

Anyway, I am bored of Facebook, but will keep my account so I can post links to my blog updates and still keep up with my friends.

I know this was a random post...but my thoughts have been random as of late while trying to rediscover myself.

2 comments:

Julie said...

I'm so glad things are getting better, and I appreciate you updating us. It seems so hard to keep up with what's really going on with everyone these days. I'm really glad that you're coming to such good insights about yourself, and I hope this results in things making you happier! I really have been thinking about you guys, and wishing you the best! Hopefully, see you soon!

starnes family said...

Thanks for the update, Amanda. Thinking about you!